Transcript

Monogamy Is Not Enough

Matthew 5:27-30
Sunday, June 1, 2008
Pastor Randy Smith

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Jesus made a profound statement to the Jews recorded in John 5: "For if you believed Moses, you would believe Me, for he wrote about Me (Jn. 5:46)." Likewise, in speaking with the men on the way to Emmaus, Luke writes: "Then beginning with Moses and with all the prophets, (Jesus) explained to them the things concerning Himself in all the Scriptures" (Lk. 24:27).

Pastor John Piper said, "The New Testament exists because the final, complete, decisive, lasting act of divine salvation happened when Jesus, the Messiah, came into the world. He was the final Adam (Romans 5:12-21), and the final prophet like Moses (Acts 3:22; 7:37), and the final Israel (Matthew 4:1-11), and the final high priest (Hebrews 7:23-24), and the final Passover sacrifice (1 Corinthians 5:7), and the final manna from heaven (John 6:31-32), and the final suffering servant of Isaiah 53 (Mark 10:45), and the final Son of Man of Daniel 7 (Matthew 24:30) (Abortion: The Innocent Blood of Our Sons and Daughters, January 27, 2008).

The progressive continuation of God's revelation reached its climax when Jesus Christ, the second Person of the Holy Trinity, the Word of God, took on flesh and entered the stage of world history. Far from simply continuing in the line of prophetic voices, Jesus stands superior to His peers. He even went so far to say, as I mentioned already, that all these voices of the past actually spoke of Him!

We already learned in 5:17 that Jesus "fulfilled" the Old Testament law. Therefore everything in the Old Testament must be viewed through the lens of Jesus' ministry and teaching. As Paul said, Jesus is the "yes" and the "amen" to all the promises of God (2 Cor. 1:20).

Arguing for the superiority of Jesus Christ, the writer to the Hebrews said, "God, after He spoke long ago to the fathers in the prophets in many portions and in many ways, in these last days has spoken to us in His Son" (Heb. 1:1-2). As God's revelation has progressed throughout church history, God saved the best for last. God sent His Son not to rubberstamp all the former prophets, but to fulfill and have the final say over all the former prophets. Remember the Transfiguration experience? Standing on a mountain with a shining face (recalling Sinai) in the presence of Moses (representing the law) and Elijah (representing the prophets). When it came time for the Holy Father to speak, His words were few: "This is My beloved Son, with whom I am well-pleased; listen to Him" (Jn. 17:5).

In the Sermon on the Mount we see Jesus speaking with divine authority. For instance, I counted fourteen times in these three chapters when He began His remarks with "I say" (5:18, 20, 22, 26, 28, 32, 34, 39, 44; 6:2, 5, 16, 25, 29). In 7:24, He calls for obedience to His words: "Therefore everyone who hears these words of Mine and acts on them, may be compared to a wise man who built his house on the rock." And in 7:22-23 He declares Himself as the judge of eternal destinies: "Many will say to Me on that day, 'Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in Your name, and in Your name cast out demons, and in Your name perform many miracles?' And then I will declare to them, 'I never knew you; depart from Me, you who practice lawlessness.'"

Paul spoke of this Christ-centered theology in Colossians 1:18: "He is also head of the body, the church; and He is the beginning, the firstborn from the dead, so that He Himself will come to have first place in everything." And when I read the Sermon on the Mount, I see Jesus Christ given "first place in everything." And this spirit that gives Jesus first place, must be continued in our own lives as well. Let me explain.

Last week we learned that Jesus equated anger with murder. Based upon that definition, all of us are mass murderers in the eyes of God. Yet we do not need the mass murderer label. In 5:22 Jesus said one act of malicious speech makes us "guilty enough to go into the fiery hell." The standard is so high, literally the righteousness of God (5:48), that none of us can make it on our own goodness.

Therefore, if we are to have any hope, we need the righteousness of God to be accredited to our account. And the only hope for that is the work of Jesus Christ which He accomplished on the cross. Jesus achieved salvation for His people by taking their sins upon Himself and transferring His righteousness to them. And we receive this gift of salvation through faith and repentance which means clinging to Jesus, surrendering to Jesus, being obedient to Jesus, and relying upon Jesus Christ - in other words, by giving Jesus Christ first place in everything.

The true believer cries out with the Apostle Paul, "I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me" (Gal. 2:20).

Last week we saw Jesus lay out the true definition of murder, which deals with the sanctity of life. This week, as we prepare for the Lord's Table, we will see Him lay out the true definition of adultery, which deals with the sanctity of marriage.

1. THE PHYSICAL SITUATION

Let's begin with what I am calling, "The Physical Situation." Verse 27, "You have heard that it was said, 'You shall not commit adultery.'"

Adultery can be defined as sexual intercourse between a man and woman when one or both of them is married. Directly from Exodus 20:14, Jesus quoted one of the Ten Commandments (cf. Dt. 5:18). And like murder, the penalty for adultery was severe. Deuteronomy 22:22, "If a man is found lying with a married woman, then both of them shall die, the man who lay with the woman, and the woman; thus you shall purge the evil from Israel" (cf. Lev. 20:10, Jn. 8:4-5).

As we learned with murder, the New Testament equally prohibits adultery. First Corinthians 6:9-10, "Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers…will inherit the kingdom of God" (cf. Gal. 5:19, 21). Hebrews 13:4, "Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge."

Yet despite its condemnation in Holy Scripture, the statistics regarding adultery reveal the behavior at mass proportions.

The Janus Report on Sexual Behavior estimates, "More than one-third of men and one-quarter of women admit having had at least one extramarital sexual experience."[1] A survey by the National Opinion Research Center (University of Chicago) found lower percentages: 25 percent of men had been unfaithful and 17 percent of women. Even when these lower ratios are applied to the current adult population, that means that some 19 million husbands and 12 million wives have had an affair.[2]

Based on much of my research this week, it seems the statistics are not much improved among those who call themselves Christians. When nearly 1000 subscribers to Christianity Today were interviewed, it was revealed that 45 percent indicated having done something sexually inappropriate, and 23 percent having extramarital intercourse.[3]

Secular family therapist and psychiatrist Frank Pittman believes, "There may be as many acts of infidelity in our society as there are traffic accidents." He further argues that the fact that adultery has become commonplace has altered society's perception of it. He says, "We won't go back to the times when adulterers were put in the stocks and publicly humiliated, or become one of those societies and there are many in which adultery is punishable by death. Society in any case is unable to enforce a rule that the majority of people break, and infidelity is so common it is no longer (seen as) deviant" (Private Lies: Infidelity and the Betrayal of Intimacy, p. 117, 13).

Yet despite the popularity, God's opinion has not changed. And despite the popularity, the consequences for committing adultery have not been reduced: Flat out rebellion against God, loss of trust in a marriage, divorce, disease, unplanned pregnancy, poor example and emotional pain to the children, stealing the present wife or the future wife of someone else, violating your testimony, shame to your family, shame to your church and public reproach. All for what? Adultery promises so much and delivers nothing but heartache and regret. Had more people considered the truth from their Creator rather than an emotional whim, they would not have run headlong into personal ruin.

2. THE EMOTIONAL SITUATION

But as we move to the second point, we have to see that there is more to adultery than the physical act. Before we get outraged at our promiscuous culture and encouraged by our own self-righteousness, it is time to do a little personal examination. In verse 28 Jesus said, "But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart."

Let's break this verse down so we can understand the true intention of our Savior's words. And might I add, although Jesus is using a man going after a woman in this verse, the principle of His teaching obviously applies in both directions.

First of all, Jesus says, "Everyone who looks at a woman." Does this mean it is a sin to even see a woman? Of course not! There is nothing wrong in looking innocently at a member of the opposite sex or even appreciating natural beauty (though we must be careful with this one!). The participle here is in the present tense which denotes an ongoing look, a continuous look. As we say, looking too long or making repeated glances.

The sin comes in the intent, which according to verse 28 is "lusting" for the individual. I feel a little silly even seeking to explain this as we all know exactly what Jesus is talking about - a purposeful look with intent to satisfy a sexual desire.

When this happens, Jesus says such an individual "has already committed adultery with her in his heart." The medium could be a magazine or a computer screen or a television. It could be directly gazing upon sunbathing neighbor or a girl in our class or an individual walking down the street. It could even be fantasying over the many images that we have burned into our imagination (by viewing things we never should have seen). The point is this: Oftentimes without the other person even being aware, we are having a sexual encounter in the depths of our hearts.

Augustine said, "Seeing women when you go out is not forbidden, but it is sinful to desire them or to wish them to desire you, for it is not by tough or passionate feeling alone but by one's gaze also that lustful desires mutually arise. And do not say that your hearts are pure if there is immodesty of the eye, because the unchaste eye carries the message of an impure heart. And when such hearts disclose their unchaste desires in a mutual gaze, even without saying a word, then it is that chastity suddenly goes out of their life, even though their bodies remain unsullied by unchaste acts."

When this happens, we not only betray our spouse, the one to whom we have given our hearts, but we also betray our God, the One who dwells within our hearts. We know God examines our hearts (1 Sam. 16:7; 1 Ki. 8:39; 1 Ch. 28:9; Psm. 7:9; Pr. 15:11; Ac. 1:24; Heb. 4:13; Rev. 2:23). And we know He must not be pleased to compete with such filth and disloyalty. "God is light, and in Him there is no darkness at all" (1 Jn. 1:5). Sexual impurity breaks our fellowship with our spouse and our Savior. As we learned in the sixth Beatitude, "Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God" (Mt. 5:8).

So do not fall for the lie when someone says, "We can window-shop, but we just can't buy anything." And though I would never deny that lustful looks can lead to adultery, according to this teaching, I need to affirm that lustful looks are adultery!

Once again, all of us stand guilty before God when we consider the heart righteousness to which our Savior calls us. As I preach this message, it sure is assuring to have these Communion elements between God's Word and His people. We'll come back to that.

So where do we go for help when we consider the sinful tendencies of our heart as we dwell in a society of unbridled indulgence in sexual passion? More than ever, temptations to lust are nearly unavoidable in our culture. Forget the multi-million dollar porn industry. Sex sells and it has invaded every circle of entertainment and media. How can we have any victory in this area?

3. THE SPIRITUAL SOLUTION

I take you to our third point. From the physical situation to the emotional situation to the spiritual solution. Jesus provides the solution in verses 29 and 30. "If your right eye makes you stumble, tear it out and throw it from you; for it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body, than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. If your right hand makes you stumble, cut it off and throw it from you; for it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body, than for your whole body to go into hell."

Throughout church history, there have been well-meaning people who have sought to take Jesus literally on His words. I have heard about some pouring poison in their eyes, others even going to the extent of castrating themselves (Origen).

But to take our Savior's words in this direction totally misses the point. Jesus is speaking figuratively. Jesus is not commanding self-mutilation, He is commanding self-control. Remember, the problem is not external body parts; the problem is in the heart. For a heart can contemplate adultery just as well with no eyes as it can with two that function perfectly well.

What we are talking about here is radically amputating sin from our lives. The language in these verses is violent. "Tear it out!" "Cut it off!" "Throw it from you!" Comparing your actions to a willingness to lose an eye or a dominate hand if it means gaining victory over this specific sin. For as Jesus reasons, it is better to lose what you value the most in this world, if it prevents you from beginning the next one being "thrown into hell" (5:29).

The key to victory is to be aware of your sin and hate it as much as God does. And when we hate it this much and see its devastating consequences, we will do everything by His grace within our power to remove ourselves from its presence. We would never keep around a pet snake that threatens to kill our kids, or the family car if the brakes were irreparable? We must begin to see sin as even more destructive than these examples.

But how?

For starters you can eliminate any "stumbling blocks" (5:29-30; cf. Job 31:1). If bikinis cause you to stumble - don't go to the beach. If the computer tempts you to view pornography - cancel you Internet subscription. If the boyfriend is pressing you for premarital sex - break off the relationship today. You say that's radical! Yes it is, but I am only keeping it within the context of Jesus' words that call us to cut off a hand or tear out an eye. The question is how far are you willing to go to honor God and amputate this sin from your heart? What additional motivation can Jesus provide than to say your eternal destiny hangs in the balance? Remember Joseph with Potiphar's wife (Gen. 39:7-12)? Run from sin (2 Tim. 2:22)! Galatians 5:24 "Now those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires."

My friends, in love, I am only seeking to warn you about the dangers of impurity. Lust is like the large colorful spider I heard about this week that lives along the banks of the Amazon. Scientists say it looks exactly like the blossom of a brilliant flower. But when bees and insects come near expecting honey, it secrets a poison that drugs and eventually kills. Like lust, it promises sweetness, but delivers death.

Married people, I have seen too many relationships shipwrecked over what one or two couples viewed as innocent lust. Singles, I have seen too many relationships fall into sin because proper physical boundaries were never established. You give sin an inch and it will take a mile. And often before you realize it, like that spider, it will anesthetize your sensitivity to sin and suck away all the vitality from your soul.

But what about my heart? Pastor, those are good solutions to prevent external temptations, but what about the continual images that are burned in my imagination that scroll through my mind throughout the day? How do I radically amputate them?

Here is what John Piper wrote:

When you are enticed sexually, do you fight with your mind to say no to the image and then mightily labor to fill your mind with counter-images that kill off the seductive image? "If you put to death the deeds of the body by the Spirit, you will live" (Romans 8:13). Too many people think they have struggled with temptation when they have prayed for deliverance, and hoped the desire would go away. That is too passive. Yes, God works in us to will and to do His good pleasure! But the effect is that we "work out our salvation with fear and trembling" (Philippians 2:12-13). Gouging out your eye may be a metaphor, but it means something very violent. The brain is a "muscle" to be flexed for purity, and in the Christian it is supercharged with the Spirit of Christ.

What this means is that we must not give a sexual image or impulse more than five seconds before we mount a violent counterattack with the mind. I mean that! Five seconds. In the first two seconds we shout, "NO! Get out of my head!" In the next two seconds we cry out: "O God, in the name of Jesus, help me. Save me now. I am yours."

Good beginning. But then the real battle begins. This is a mind war. The absolute necessity is to get the image and the impulse out of our mind. How? Get a counter-image into the mind. Fight. Push. Strike. Don't ease up. It must be an image that is so powerful that the other image cannot survive. There are lust-destroying images and thoughts.

For example, have you ever in the first five seconds of temptation, demanded of your mind that it look steadfastly at the crucified form of Jesus Christ? Picture this. You have just seen a peek-a-boo blouse inviting further fantasy. You have five seconds. "No! Get out of my mind! God help me!" Now, immediately, demand of your mind - you can do this by the Spirit (Romans 8:13). Demand of your mind to fix its gaze on Christ on the cross.

Use all your fantasizing power to see his lacerated back. Thirty-nine lashes left little flesh intact. He heaves with His breath up and down against the rough vertical beam of the cross. Each breath puts splinters into the lacerations. The Lord gasps. From time to time He screams out with intolerable pain. He tries to pull away from the wood and the massive spokes through His wrist rip into the nerve endings and He screams again with agony and pushes up with His feet to give some relief to His wrists. But the bones and nerves in His pierced feet crush against each other with anguish and He screams again. There is no relief. His throat is raw from screaming and thirst. He loses His breath and thinks He is suffocating, and suddenly His body involuntarily gasps for air and all the injuries unite in pain. In torment, He forgets about the crown of two-inch thorns and throws His head back in desperation, only to hit one of the thorns perpendicular against the cross beam and drive it half an inch into His skull. His voice reaches a soprano pitch of pain and sobs break over His pain-wracked body as every cry brings more and more pain.

Now, I am not thinking about the blouse any more. I am at Calvary. These two images are not compatible. If you will use the muscle of your brain to pursue-violently pursue with the muscle of your mind-images of Christ crucified with the same creative energy that you use to pursue sexual fantasies, you will kill them. But it must start in the first five seconds- and not give up.

So my question is: Do you fight, rather than only praying and waiting and trying to avoid? It is image against image. It is ruthless, vicious mental warfare, not just prayer and waiting. Join me in this bloody warfare to keep my mind and body pure for my Lord and my wife and my church. Jesus suffered beyond imagination to "purify for Himself a people for His own possession" (Titus 2:14). Every scream and spasm was to kill my lust - "He Himself bore our sins in His body on the cross, so that we might die to sin and live to righteousness" (1 Peter 2:24).

Pursuing purity of heart at any cost,

Pastor John Piper
A Passion for Purity vs. Passive Prayers, November10, 1999

That's powerful! It reminds me of a poem:

Two natures beat within my beast

The one is foul and the one is blest

The one I love and the one I hate

The one I feed will dominate

How can I take pleasure in that which nailed the Lover of my soul to the cross?

Beloved, I finish where I began. There is good news! But our only hope is keeping Jesus Christ "first place."

We will have victory if we love the Lord more than we love our lust. Lust promises us pleasure. We need to understand the greater pleasure offered to us in Christ. By His grace, our Lord can change our desires and give us the strength to live a pure life. There is nothing more beautiful and satisfying than a relationship that emulates the purity of God by keeping sexual expression in its proper place.

And our only hope in salvation is keeping Jesus Christ "first place" as well. Though God expects His people to be a people that pursue righteousness, all of us know as C.H. Spurgeon said, we will battle this sin all the way to the grave. Are any of our hearts pure enough in this area alone to earn salvation? But with Christ, there is forgiveness, even for adulterers. With Christ we can be given His righteousness to be accepted by God.

Based upon this message alone, we are all guilty before God. None of us can achieve His standard. But our God in His mercy has provided a sufficient remedy for our hopelessness. Only when we see the depths of our sin will we see the need for Jesus Christ.

Are you continually looking to Him for strength? Are you continually reaching out to Him for salvation? Is it lust or Jesus Christ that really occupies "first place" in your heart?