Transcript

Love And Restoration

Matthew 18:15-20
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Pastor Randy Smith

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As you heard during the Scripture reading, we have before us without a doubt the most controversial passage in the entire book of Matthew. Many preachers have chosen to skip this subject completely. And most wouldn't go anywhere near it on their fourth Sunday in a new church! Yet what does that say? That pastors are wiser than God in what needs to be taught? What does it communicate to the congregation? That certain parts of the Bible are permitted to be ignored? That clear commands to the church are optional?

Perhaps establishing the context from chapter 18 will help put this material in perspective.

Last week we learned that God hates sin. We learned about the serious consequences of sin described with terms such as "eternal fire" and "fiery hell" (Mt. 18:9-9). We learned that an individual would be better off dead (a heavy millstone tied around his neck and drown in the depth of the sea - Mt. 18:6) than to lead a child of God into sin. So would it not be safe to assume that there would be great blessings to the one who would lead the child of God out of sin? Great blessings to the one who promotes holiness?

Last week we learned that God is the Good Shepherd who leaves the ninety-nine and goes after the one that is straying. And when He restores the sheep that departed from the fold, He "rejoices over it more than over the ninety-nine which have not gone astray" (Mt. 18:13). Unrepented sin causes us to break fellowship with God. It put us in a position of danger. It grieves God's heart, and it should grieve ours as well. He wants us back. So why would we think it so strange that God would use His church to bring a straying sheep back to a position of safety and protection? Isn't that a good thing?

Next week we will learn about forgiving a person who sins. Today's passage is the link in between last week's and next week's lesson.

I know that today's passage has been abused by churches over the years. I know that today's passage raises many questions. "Aren't we told to judge not lest we be judged?" "Shouldn't he who is without sin be the first to cast the stone?" "Isn't such a process unloving and unmerciful?"

Stay with me as we dive into the Word of God and see what Jesus Christ has to say about this matter. I trust when we are done your questions will be answered and you will have a greater appreciation for the true wisdom of our Lord, even when it appears quite controversial to the false wisdom of our age.

1. THE COMMAND OF CHRIST (verses 15-17)

We begin with the command of Christ. An imperative is given to His church. Verse 15, "If your brother sins [some versions add "against you"], go and show him his fault in private."

Allow me to be clear. We are not called to be the "sin police." We are not to find joy running around like detectives uncovering the weaknesses of others. We are even told at times when presented with another's sin to overlook the offense (Pr. 19:11; Col. 3:13).

What we are talking about here is unrepented sin in the life of another believer ("brother") that brings itself to our attention. What we are talking about here is sin that is causing damage to the spiritual or physical well-being of the individual and the body of Christ as a whole.

The command is clear. We are to go and show the fellow believer his or her fault. "What, that's judging someone!" In a sense you are right, but it is not the sinful judging that you are thinking about and the kind that God condemns (Mt. 7:1)!

God continually calls us to make judgments (cf. 1 Cor. 5:12). We are called to make judgments about false teachers by examining their fruits (Mt. 7:15-20). Parents are called to make judgments about their child's behavior. We have appointed judges all over our country to enforce the law. Should we empty every prison because we should judge not? The whole Christian life is making judgments as to proper behavior (read Proverbs!). And here is the key - all judgments must be made according to the Word of God.

To confront someone because of personal convictions is the sinful type of judgment. But when we judge based upon the Word of God, it is not we who are judging but God Himself. To "show [a Christian] his fault" is to show a Christian where he is violating a direct principle from God's Word. How can a fellow believer have a problem with that when he understands the destructive nature of sin and has as his life's goal to please God by living according to the Bible?

If you were an elite sprinter would you be offended if someone showed you how to shave a half second off your time? If you are a Christian your greatest goal in life is to be more like Christ. Why do we get so bent out of shape when someone tries to point us in that direction? Therefore wise people receive reproof. Proverbs 9:8, "Do not reprove a scoffer, or he will hate you, reprove a wise man and he will love you."

Obviously there are conditions when confronting another in their sin. First, as I already mentioned, the offense must be a direct violation of the Scriptures. Second, as we already learned in chapter 7, you must be blameless in the area yourself. God hates hypocrisy. Remember our Lord's words: don't try to remove a splinter from your brother's eye when you have a 2x4 in your own. Third, the attitude must be one of gentleness and humility, prayerfully coming in the spirit of love not condemnation, seeking restoration not retribution (cf. Gal. 6:1). And fourth, as it says in verse 15, done always in private. I find it interesting that we have so much trouble confronting another in private (which our Lord desires), but find so much ease gossiping and complaining about another with several people in public (which our Lord detests). The goal is to keep the circle of people involved as small as possible for as long as possible.

So what is you aim? Score points over another? Reveal your self-righteousness? Personal revenge? Enjoyment of confrontation? Absolutely not! Those are sin, folks! The aim is to restore such a person. The very next section in this context is all about forgiveness (Mt. 18:21-35). Or as the end of verse 15 says, "If he listens to you, you have won your brother over." Restoration accomplished. Forgiveness extended. Case closed.

But what if he doesn't listen?

The Bible gives us the answer if such a person does not repent after a period of time. Verse 16, "But if he does not listen to you, take one or two more with you, so that by the mouth of two or three witnesses every fact may be confirmed." Two or three witness is a Jewish principle spoken of in the Old Testament (cf. Dt. 19:15). It was in place to both confirm the sin committed and protect the other party from being falsely accused.

And if he doesn't listen to them?

Verse 17, "If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church." The sphere is enlarged once again. The goal is not to embarrass the individual, but to encourage the church to urge the person to repent. If he refuses to listen to even the entire church, such a person shows no evidence of desiring to follow Christ. That is why verse 17 concludes, "And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector." Such an individual is to be treated like an unbeliever. And let's remember this is the command of Jesus Christ.

Now that I have probably scared half of you to death, allow me to make some comments. Rarely does a case make it to this third step. In my nine years as a pastor at Grace Tabernacle, only two situations ever reached this level and both of these individuals have repented. And when you examine the Bible regarding sins that reach public exposure, they are always very public in nature. Sexual immorality: 1 Corinthians 5:2, "You have become arrogant and have not mourned instead, so that the one who had done this deed would be removed from your midst." False teaching: 1 Timothy 1:20, "Among these are Hymenaeus and Alexander, whom I have handed over to Satan, so that they will be taught not to blaspheme." Public sin of leaders: 1 Timothy 5:20, "Those who continue in sin, rebuke in the presence of all, so that the rest also will be fearful of sinning." Divisive behavior: Titus 3:10, "Reject a factious man after a first and second warning" (cf. Rom. 16:17).

Regardless of how some may feel, the command of Christ is clear. The church belongs to Him and His people are expected to uphold His expectations. And because some will resist this procedure, Jesus Christ has made it clear that He will be on the side of those who do what He says. So let's move from the command of Christ to the confirmation from Christ.

2. THE CONFIRMATION FROM CHRIST (verses 18-20)

Verse 18, "Truly I say to you, whatever you bind on earth shall have been bound in heaven; and whatever you loose on earth shall have been loosed in heaven."

This verse has the tremendous ability to be misapplied, but if we keep it in the context it makes perfect sense. Jesus is not saying that we can force God's will in heaven to comply with our demands. God is not Santa Claus. We cannot demand our wishes and then require God's will to bend to ours.

The verse teaches exactly the opposite. God's will is already bound in heaven. It is revealed in the Scriptures. Therefore when we do God's will as He has revealed it, we can have the confidence that heaven is on our side. So when we hold people accountable to Scripture and do it with the system that God prescribed in the Scripture we can be confident that we have God's power and approval.

More confidence is given in verse 19: "Again I say to you, that if two of you agree on earth about anything that they may ask, it shall be done for them by My Father who is in heaven."Again, Jesus confirms that when people seek to maintain a pure church, God the Father is on their side.

More confidence is given in verse 20: "For where two or three have gathered together in My name, I am there in their midst." I have heard countless sermons saying this verse refers to prayer. As a new believer I can remember the confusion. If I am alone praying does that mean God is not with me? Again, Scripture must be interpreted in its context. And again, we can have the confidence that Jesus Christ is with us when we work together and follow His procedures for church discipline.

So the command is clearly given as to how we are to deal with sin in our midst. And we can have the confirmation that when we conduct ourselves according to the command, that heaven is on our side, God the Father will bless the process and Jesus Christ will be in our presence.

But since this concept is so controversial and ignored by many churches, please give me just a few minutes to remind you why we must abide by the words of Jesus Christ in this area. And I will do it under the two topics of love and holiness.

Love

First, love. While many would argue that calling someone out on their sin is unloving, I would argue just the opposite if it is done in the right manner and with the right attitude.

For starters, many have developed in their minds a pagan view of love. Biblical love is not a feel-good emotional sensation. Many marriages are based on this notion and therefore many marriages come to a crashing end. Such love is fleeting. On the other hand, biblical love is a deliberate action to put the needs of another above your own even when it is not reciprocated. Jesus did not love us by sentimental feelings. Such an attitude would have never redeemed us from our sins. Rather He loves us and demonstrated that love through sacrifice and service even when we did not love Him in return. We must love others in the same way.

Christ died to pull us out of the slimy pit of sin. He died to free us from our slavery to sin. He died to remove the wrath of God because of our sin. How can a Christian still cherish sin? And how can a Christian observe another Christian in sin and be unmoved and unconcerned? I see no loving spirit in that at all. Love is leading others to Christ and encouraging them to obey His commandments. "If you love Me," said Jesus, "You will keep My commandments" (Jn. 14:15). Don't we love others enough to want them to love God?

Furthermore if we understood the destructive nature of sin we would go out of our way to help a person repent. If your child was playing in the middle of traffic would you leave her there? "Who am I to judge her actions!" If your friend was addicted to crack would you let him continue in his behavior with no warning? After all we learned in last week's sermon, the wages of sin are far more dangerous (cf. 1 Cor. 11:30; 1 Cor. 11:30; 1 Jn. 5:16-17). And as adults, how many consequences in our life would have been spared if someone had encouraged us not to sin? To leave someone in sin is not loving but the epitome of unconcern and ignorance. In the Bible discipline is a sign of love (Pr. 3:11-12; Heb. 12:7-11). Parents fail if they refuse to discipline their kids. The church is no different.

Furthermore how loving is it when a church refuses to deal with the messy issues out of convenience to the detriment of others in the flock? Is it loving when we permit predators to prey on our children and single ladies? Is it loving when we allow factious individuals to upset our unity and emotionally damage souls? Is it loving when a broken wife says, "My husband is leaving me and the kids" and we sit back and refuse to get involved to restore the marriage?

The church is a body. A loving body understands its responsibility to one another. And to use the shepherding metaphor, when a sheep strays we seek it out, not to harm it but to help it. That's love!

Holiness

Second, holiness. We are not a social club. We are the church, people called by God to reflect His glory, His holy glory. As He said in 1 Peter, "You shall be holy, for I am holy" (1 Pet. 1:16).

Here is how God's holiness is not promoted when sin is left unchecked.

First sin starts to spread. 1 Corinthians 5:6, "Do you not know that a little leaven leavens the whole lump of dough?" 1 Corinthians 15:33, "Do not be deceived: 'Bad company corrupts good morals.'" Sin in one promotes sin in others. Accountability is lifted. Deterrents are removed. Poor examples are followed. Sin begins to spread amongst the church like cancer. God is not glorified.

Then our unholy reputation begins to become known to the community. We hear sayings such as, "I'd never go to that church in a million years. One of the most immoral and crooked people I know attends that assembly." "Those guys are a bunch of hypocrites. Their lives are not backing up their message." If we act like the world, the world will have no interest in that which makes us unique. Our evangelism is injured. God is not glorified.

At this point we have become nothing more than a gathering. The sign out front may still say "church," but we are no longer considered a church in the sight of God. The Spirit of God has departed and with Him goes all the divine blessings. Something has to be in place to keep us in check. Something like our Lord's words that we learned about today. That is why the great Baptist, John Dagg, once said, "When discipline leaves the church, Christ goes with it."

I fully understand that this side of heaven we will not be perfect. But rather than just giving in to our sin, may we submit to the Holy Spirit as He seeks to conform us to the image of Christ. May we be known as a people who do fail, but by God's grace seek to love one another and live holy lives. May we seek to become today what we will be one day: the glorious bride of Christ without spot or wrinkle trusting the commands of Christ to lead us in that direction.